commune -ique

simply. communication is a funny thing.

not funny 'haha' (though i can be), but still 'funny' in some way. not quite sure where i'm going with this, but we'll see...

at the heart of communication is communing. right? the coming together of two or more people. (can you communicate with yourself. keep an open dialogue, find better perspective through it. huh. i don't know. not what i'm getting at.) communication is not the trading or passing of information, like i think that our society/culture would have us believe. words, whether written or spoken. actions, too. indirect and directly affecting actions.

the information age, yes? age of mass communication, yes? but are we finding the root. are we actually communing, though.

when i think of the word communing, i gather a mental image (always silent) of two people sitting close. flesh, energy, and other unknowable things pass between them, in this dream. like hands (not hands) moving back and forth between. give and take. equality.

we talk talk talk so much. but what do we actually convey. we do do do (mostly inward focused), but do we allow ourselves to truly connect or be connected to.

in previous days, (long previous days...), when you wanted to communicate, you had to walk up to a person and speak to them. give or leave them a gift. write thoughts and feelings and words on pages and give/send them.

i now find myself changing. focusing less inward and more outward. towards a specific someone, albeit. a daily renewed desire to commune heavily weighs on me. it is not a burden, but rather a calling.

i desire to commune with her. daily. hourly. in more and less words.

i fancy myself a wordsmith sometimes (and a thoughtsmith at times as well...). but i'm finding that with this renewed desire to deeply commune, i'm having to re-examine what true communication is all about. in some senses, i'm having to re-invent my own usage of words and thoughts. i must emply new tactics, for this new desire.

thankfully i will not labor forever. i have a hope in a time after this life, where true communion will be found. where all may share intimately in HIM and in one another.

but for now, for me and for her, i will continue in my strivings...